i went to copp’s grocery store yesterday to buy food and drinks for the party after jackie’s baptism. while i was in the soft drink aisle a little, old lady starting randomly talking to me (i would guess she was around 80). she commented on how many soft drinks i was buying. i told her why i was buying them and she seemed happy with that.
she then said “i’m glad to see you are buying dr. pepper.”
truthfully i wasn’t really sure how to respond to that comment. it’s nice that that she was pleased with what i was purchasing but also a little unusual. i simple wasn’t sure how i was supposed to comment on her statement. was i supposed to tell her that it pleased me to know that i had pleased her? so in confusion i took the whimpy way out and opted for a bland “thanks.”
her next response was what really threw me off. she said, “i can’t drink pepsi because it makes me burp a lot.”
this is simple not what i expect to discuss with 80 year olds that i don’t know. maybe i’ve lived a sheltered life but i don’t usually discuss belching with strangers, let alone strangers that are little old ladies. nothing in my past has prep’d me for how to interact with such discussions. i began to have serious fears that this lady might move in other directions. if she was okay discussion her belches with people she didn’t know then she might also feel comfortable discussing suppositories or laxatives with anyone passing by. i wasn’t going to stay around for those discussions. therefore, i said, “yes, pepsi is a rather gassy drink” and then headed out of the aisle as fast as i could.
yes, i am a coward. i know i probably missed a better story by running away with my tail tuck between my legs but some stories simply carry too much risk with them.