whoosh!

fast pitch softball scares me. i used to play baseball – a long time ago – and i used to umpire baseball – not quite as long ago. i was never scared of a baseball zooming past me at faster speeds than a softball ever travels, but baseballs are small. softballs are large. it’s the size of the softball that freaks me out. it was never intended by the LORD GOD ALMIGHTY for anyone to stand still when an object as large as a softball was thrown towards them. it’s a reflex. you see a softball sized object coming towards you and you instinctually duck. it’s the way it should be. baseballs are below this reflex level. this is why baseball makes sense – the ball is small enough not to cause our natural human response of fear and trembling. this is only true for fast pitch softball, slow pitch is a different beast completely.

i went to watch woodlawn high school play softball today and the whole experience was scary for me. i kept on wanting to shout at the girls standing in the batters’ box “get out of the way! there’s a softball-sized object coming towards you!” for some reason i don’t understand they did not seem scared of the softballs. it appears as if i am the only human who knows about the anti-softball reflex.

i’m presently watching a professor in thermodynamics on “the late show” sit in ice water for 2 five minutes segments and discuss hypothermia. you wouldn’t think this was very funny, but for some reason it is. letterman is the greatest.