the marko effect

i promise that i will soon begin to blog about something other than marko but i thought some of you would find the power of marko interesting. above is the google analytics graph for the traffic to my blog for the week before yesterday. as you can see i had my normal 40 people coming to view the blog (approximately 35 of which are my mom). things changed dramatically once marko posted the link to the top ten list. the traffic jumped up to 364.

to give you a comparison i’ll compare the traffic to my blog when it was put on the ys update (back in september). here’s the graph for that.

as you can see it wasn’t as big of a jump. marko is basically three times more influential than the ys update. he is a online youth ministry power and a force to be reckoned with.

all hail the power of marko’s name.

SIDE NOTE – after changing my design several times i finally built the desk for my study (now affectionately dubbed the “man cave” by pam). it’s basically a collapsible table so that the “man cave” can easily be turned into the “guest room” when the need arises. that’s right my space has to remain portable so that i can remove my stuff when we have company. oh yes, i am master of this domain.

the desk cost me a grand total of $16.24 after tax. now i’m getting an old computer from my dad (needs a power supple – $30) that i can run ubuntu on, and probably a widescreen monitor for movies.

top ten reasons why marko should link to one of my posts – part 1

as many of you know marko posted a link to to one of j.t.’s (blessed be his name) posts. it is now my goal to goad marko into posting a link to one of my posts. of course, i could just post something good but it’s so much more fun to be lazy and try this approach. so here is the first set of the “top ten reasons why marko should link to one of my posts”:

    10. my posts may be lame but they’re no lamer than the items that marko points out as being stupid in his “JESUS junk of the month awards. while i can’t claim the ability to post something as good as j.t. (blessed be his name) i do think that at least some of my posts add more of a contribution to the internet and life than the miracolous JESUS night light. even though it’s a small contribution to the world wide web it is still a contribution and it should be honored. i can think of no better way to do this than by marko linking to one of my posts.

    9. peace on earth – oestreicher is a german name and terrell is an english name. marko, your people have been attempting to brutalize my people for centuries. don’t you think it’s about time you commit an act of peace and bring our people together. i think linking to one of my posts would be such act. sort of like when one monarch would marry off one of his children to the enemy and thus insure peace. marko, it’s about time for peace.

    8. it would be a good escape from the san diego nywc. when you really get down to it who wants to listen to shane claiborne, doug fields, the david crowder band, chris tomlin, or third day? nobody i know. having to listen to those guys for 5 days is simply not the way to have a good time. i know that it’s probably wearing mako down. wouldn’t it be a nice break to post a link to my blog? come on marko, i’m only thinking of you. it’s important for your health.

    7. i will name all my future children “marko” no matter what sex they are. this offer is not diminished by the fact that i had a little surgery awhile back that makes it unlikely that i will have any more biological children. it’s the thought that counts and i’ve honestly had the thought of naming my future children “marko,” if marko will post a link to one of my posts. “marko elizabeth terrell” actually has a nice ring to it.

    6. marko should ask himself “what would JESUS do?” we all know that JESUS would say “marko, give the guy a link.” that’s the way JESUS rolls and as a follower of JESUS marko should do the same thing. you could almost say that by linking to one of my posts marko would be practicing discipleship. now i don’t want to go so far as to say that it would be a sin for marko not to post a link to one of my posts but scripture does say that to him who knows what is right and doesn’t do it. i’m just trying to protect marko’s soul.

an impossibe challenge

as i posted yesterday j.t. (blessed be his name) made it onto marko’s blog and thereby became a youth ministry god. being a vain and conceited person i released my not so veiled attempt to goad marko into linking to a post on my blog. all i got was a comment. for those too lazy to visit the comment i post below what the great middle school one said:

nice. write a post like j.t.’s, and maybe — just maybe, i’ll link to you.

the problem here is that this is nigh impossible. j.t. (blessed be his name) is … well … a youth ministry god, and i’m not even a youth minister anymore (unless you count the only adolescent we have in our church but i like to call that parenting instead of youth ministry). there is no way that i can write a post like j.t.’s. (blessed be his name). you might ask well ask porky pig to speak eloquently or dwight schrute not to be weird. it’s just not possible. remember j.t. (blessed be his name) is a youth ministry god and i can’t compete with a god.

i actually think that one of the main reasons that j.t. (blessed be his name) can write such remarkable posts and i can’t is because of the differences in our hair. here’s a south park inspired version of j.t. (blessed be his name) on the left and a simpsons inspired version of me on the right.

notice the clean aerodynamic lines of j.t.’s (blessed be his name) head? this helps wind to flow smoothly over his head and thus prompts the exchange of heat between his head and the air. this heat exchange is key to maintaining the proper temperature of the brain and thus promoting amazing thoughts. on the other hand (or head), look at my head. the hair there ruins the flow of air and thereby kills the heat exchange. if i think real hard without this exchange of heat my brain freezes up until it cools down. yes i am missing a good bit of hair but my widows peak is just enough to stop the proper flow of air. some of you might be thinking that i could solve this heat exchange problem by shaving my head to look like j.t.’s (blessed be his name). the problem here is that my head looks really bad when bald. it’s a disability and it’s not real nice of you to point out my disabilities.

so as you can see i will never be able to write a post as good as j.t.’s (blessed be his name) and thereby get marko to link to my blog. as far as i can see this leaves me with only one other option of drawing the attention of the the great one of middle school knowledge, marko. i will kiss up to marko as much as humanly possible. in seminary i always hated it when people went up to the professors after class with the obvious desire just to get the prof’s attention. i thought i would never become one of those people but this is so much more important than my theological education. it’s marko’s blog and therefore i’m willing to humiliate myself as needed.

if this fails i’ll probably just start a psuedo-marko blog, link to myself, and pretend like it really is marko. if i pretend, then no one will know the difference.