yesterday i proved that i am an idiot. now this is really nothing new. i have a long history of proving that i don’t really use common sense. this history includes the time that i broke two windows in my home on the same day with a basketball – once by kicking the basketball and then again by showing someone how i broke the first window, it includes the time that i threw not one but three separate anchors out of our boat thinking each one was tied onto the boat, it includes the time i drove over some bushes trying to escape from another dumb mistake, and it includes many other times of stupidity. the sad thing is that after 36 years i continue to add to my history of proving my lack of common sense.
sunday was one of those days when i added to the proof of my idiocy. i unlocked the door to my home sunday and then went back to the car to help my sons get stuff inside the house – it was raining. when i got back into the house i went to the bedroom and changed into some dry clothes. the whole process took 10 minutes at most. in that 10 minutes i some how subconsciously hide my keys from myself. now while i may not be very good at using common sense i am apparently very talented at subconsciously hiding things because i still can not find my keys. i’ve looked almost everywhere. i looked in the freezer, i looked in my old clothes, i looked in the kids toy box, i looked on the book shelves, and i looked throughout the kitchen cabinets. i’ve found nothing…well that’s not actually true. i’ve actually found allot of change, some socks i was missing, a few reminders that i had forgotten about, and a ton of other junk, but i haven’t found the one thing i was looking for – my keys.
now being key less has changed my life. this morning i had to ride to work with pam, something i like doing because i love my wife, but it also means that i don’t have a car during the day and since i didn’t think to bring lunch i had to sit around waiting for someone else to go to lunch. of course, they left for lunch earlier than i thought they would so i missed my ride and went without lunch. i would have left with someone else to go to lunch but since losing them sunday i don’t have the right keys to get back into my study so if i left with anyone other than the crew that works in my area i would be locked out of the office suite and not able to get back in until the afternoon. i just sat in my study hungry and thirsty jealous of all the people in the world who have keys. my whole work day was thrown off because i couldn’t get where i needed to be or couldn’t unlock the door to get the things i needed to get.
argh! i wish the world had no keys … or that i had one of those great “clapper” devices that would tell me where my keys were hidden. if only i weren’t an idiot i would have bought one of those “clapper” things when i still had my keys.