Category: church

I’ve recently been thinking about how different people conect with others in the church. I think there are three basic types of people in regards to their connection with others. They are:

1. Takers
2. Givers
3. Balanced

Now I know there are lots of diferent people that attend church and most people vary within these categories depending upon wat is going on in their lives. These three categories are just for my discussion of how people connect with others (i.e. the church word of “fellowship”). They are just broad generalizations for discusion. Here’s what I mean.

Takers
People in this group seem to think that fellowship is mainly about people doing things for them. If you haven’t done something for them recently then something is wrong with your friendship. In the church world I used to hear people every now and then say how they were leaving a certain chuch group because they “weren’t being fed” there or people in the church just didn’t connect with others. I don’t hear this anymore because people at Tapestry don’t talk that way. The Takers soak it all up and when there is nothing left to soak up then they think something is wrong. It is all about them.

Givers
People in this group seem to think that fellowship is mainly about meeting other people’s needs. The problem with this view is that this sounds noble and good but it isn’t. Serving others is noble and good but not allowing others to serve you is rather selfish. When a person insists on serving but never allows others to serve them I fear it has more to do with control than with humility. It is selfishness wearing a mask.

Balanced
In my opinion the goal is to be here. Sometimes the most loving thing a person can do for others is to serve them and other times the most loving thing a person can do for others is to allow them to serve you. That’s really what fellowship is about. Meeting the needs of others and allowing them to meet you needs.

I hope this week you are able to seve someone in the fellowship of faith you belng to and allow someone in that fellowship to serve you. Being balanced is a great thing. Just taking or just giving screws everything up.

one of the things i came away from Q with was a desire to start praying for a different point area church each week. this wasn’t actually a part of Q but something that hit me from one of the presenter’s “throwaway comments.” so here’s the list of all the point area churches in the yellow pages and when i will be praying for them. all you threads are welcome to join me in doing this. i’m thinking of sending the prayed for church a card or a note each week and i am considering placing the card on the back table at tapestry each week so that any thread who wants to can also sign it.

so why is this an experiment? well because i’m not sure what the result will be? will i be changed? will tapestry be changed? how will these churches respond? i have my thoughts but i am not sure.

SIDE NOTE – if you find yourself wondering about the obviously random order of this church list the answer is that i didn’t want to pray for them alphabetically. therefore i put the list through a random generator to mix up the order. 🙂

i saw the above video on a friend’s facebook profile and thought i would comment on it. before i say anything about my thoughts on the vieo though please let me start by saying that i know this is meant to be a humorous attempt to address what is seen as a need at that church. while i have issues with ever using eternal damnation as a punch line i do recognize this is supposed to be a joke and not a theological statement.

BUT …

… i believe that all of our statements, including our jokes, come out of our theology. they come out of what we believe life, faith, and church is all about and what is most important in life, faith, and church. if i have ever had coffee with you there is a decent chance that somewhere during our conversation i have pulled out my journal and drawn the illustration to the right. it is a drawing i use when i discuss how our churches’ architecture and setups reflect what we value the most. i believe you can usually tell what is most important to a church simply by looking at the space they use for their gatherings and how it is setup.

i think this video does the exact same thing. it shows what is most important to this church and how you are supposed to respond to it. just look at the escalation of “fines.” interrupt announcement? throw $25 in the offering plate. interrupt the sermon? i think the punishment is a little worse. yes, i know it is a joke but i do think it shows what part of their worship service they want least likely interrupted?

when a cell phones go off during a tapestry worship gathering, and they do often enough, most people think nothing of it. usually the phone is turned off and every thing continues as before. other times it is such an awesome ringtone that i actually comment on it during the message. finally there are times where it is most GOD-honoring for the person who received the phone call to answer the phone and start a conversation. they do so by moving to the back of the room to carry on their conversation. sometimes after the phone call they actually report on what was said (i remember a baby’s birth being announced during the message). we just don’t believe that a little thing like a cell phone is powerful enough to chase the presence of GOD out of the room.

i think our actions and setup in tapestry show what we believe is most important about our worship gatherings. the music and the message are important but they are not the most important. connecting people with the ONE WHOSE image they bear is what is most important to us. sometimes that involves the sermon, sometimes that involves the music, and sometimes that involves a ringing cell phone.

yesterday i ran into mayor halverson of stevens point while drinking coffee at emy j’s.  i introduced myself, gave him my card, and told him i would love the opportunity to take him out for coffee and ask him a few questions concerning point. i’ve emailed his office a couple a times a year since we moved to the point area asking if i could take him to coffee and ask him the following questions:

1. what do you think are the biggest needs in the point area and how do you think the churches of the area can be a part of the solution to these needs?
2. what do you wish a church in the area would do?
3. what is the best kept secret in the point area?
4. can you tell me three other people who love the area that you think i should take out for coffee and a conversation?

i really hope i hear back from him because i really want to hear his thoughts on these questions.

when guests come to tapestry i like to take them out for coffee/ice cream at emy j’s or if need be at zest coffee house by uwsp. i do this to say “thanks” to them for coming and being a part of one of our worship gatherings, to hear their story, and to answer any questions they might have concerning tapestry (we are a bit of a strange breed). yesterday i visited with one such guest and the thread who is her friend.

one of the things i typically do when grabbing coffee with one of our guests is ask what other churches in point he/she has visited. we have quite a few excellent churches in point that i am quite fond of. my biggest concern for everyone who visits tapestry is that they find a community of faith that helps them to best connect with JESUS CHRIST. for some people that gathering is tapestry, which i completely understand because i love this group of people. for others it is one of the other fine churches in the point area. i believe that is one of the benefits of the many different churches in the point area – there is more variety and thus better connections to CHRIST for a variety of people. so i point out other churches that i hope they have or will visit to check out for themselves if they connect better with CHRIST through those communities of faith. again the main point here is for them to find a place that helps them walk in faith. of course, i try to reinforce over and over that i am not telling them to go to another church. i would like for them to connect with CHRIST through us but if that doesn’t happen then i want them to try other churches. so again and again i say “please don’t think that i am asking you to go to another church, i love being around the people of tapestry and i hope you will too.”

so yesterday i went through my spiel with this guest. around the third time i reinforced that i wasn’t asking this guest to go somewhere else the guest’s thread friend started laughing. i asked what was up and she said that some of her friends had heard that i recommended other churches to people and they thought that was odd. apparently i have developed a rep as the pastor that brags on other churches. i guess i can live with that rep.