Category: random thoughts

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Chastity vs Modesty

Every so often I see friends and acquaintances on the internet go off on modesty. I can’t say anything near as good as what C.S. Lewis said on the matter so I will just quote him. In Mere Christianity Mr. Lewis said:

WE MUST NOW CONSIDER Christian morality as regards sex, what Christians call the virtue of chastity. The Christian rule of chastity must not be confused with the social rule of “modesty” (in one sense of that word); i.e. propriety, or decency. The social rule of propriety lays down how much of the human body should be displayed and what subjects can be referred to, and in what words, according to the customs of a given social circle. Thus, while the rule of chastity is the same for all Christians at all times, the rule of propriety changes. A girl in the Pacific islands wearing hardly any clothes and a Victorian lady completely covered in clothes might both be equally “modest,” proper, or decent, according to the standards of their own societies: and both, for all we could tell by their dress, might be equally chaste (or equally unchaste). Some of the language which chaste women used in Shakespeare’s time would have been used in the nineteenth century only by a woman completely abandoned. When people break the rule of propriety current in their own time and place, if they do so in order to excite lust in themselves or others, then they are offending against chastity. But if they break it through ignorance or carelessness they are guilty only of bad manners. When, as often happens, they break it defiantly in order to shock or embarrass others, they are not necessarily being unchaste, but they are being uncharitable: for it is uncharitable to take pleasure in making other people uncomfortable. I do not think that a very strict or fussy standard of propriety is any proof of chastity or any help to it, and I therefore regard the great relaxation and simplifying of the rule which has taken place in my own lifetime as a good thing. At its present stage, however, it has this inconvenience, that people of different ages and different types do not all acknowledge the same standard, and we hardly know where we are. While this confusion lasts I think that old, or old-fashioned, people should be very careful not to assume that young or “emancipated” people are corrupt whenever they are (by the old standard) improper; and, in return, that young people should not call their elders prudes or puritans because they do not easily adopt the new standard. A real desire to believe all the good you can of others and to make others as comfortable as you can will solve most of the problems.

I think that last line is well worth living out. I’ll just try to think all the good I can of others and make others as comfortable as I can.

 

 

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Time & Creativity > Money

I’ve posted a few times before about creativity. The reason for this is that I wish I was a more creative person. Therefore I like to see and point out when people are doing really creative things. I really enjoy the duo Pomplamoose because of their creativity (and their music also). The above video is one such example.  I’m sure it didn’t cost that much money to produce but it definitely required a great deal of time and creativity. Money is pretty much always a poor but manageable substitute for time and creativity.  Many of Pomplamoose’s videos are like this in creativity.

I think through the best things that I have done in my life, relationships, and ministry and most of the time it comes down to the time and creativity I put into whatever I was doing. Which makes me think that I should do a little more of that.

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Signalling Theory

Thanks to Freakonomics and Planet Money I have become fascinated with signalling theory  recently. Here’s a short definition of signalling theory from wikipedia.

In economics, more precisely in contract theory, signalling (or signaling: see American and British English differences) is the idea that one party (termed the agent) credibly conveys some information about itself to another party (the principal).

Pretty straight forward. I want to learn more about it.

The discussion that I have listened to concerning signalling theory has come from the two aforementioned podcasts. Those podcasts have focused on the fact that we all signal people about ourselves all the time. Things we wear, things we do, etc., etc. signal other concerning what groups we belong to and what we value. It might be easier to spot certain groups’ signalling, but we all signal. For example, it is pretty easy to spot the signalling of conspicuous consumption. The little alligators on the shirt send out a pretty blatant message. So do the DC’s on sunglasses and other things. It isn’t just self-conscious teens and shallow adults who signal. The rest of us just use different signals. While our symbols might not be as easy to spot they are still there. These symbols shout out something and the person wearing them is choosing to wear them because they believe somehow that those clothes and accessories convey some message concerning who they are or who they want to be perceived as. Or consider one of the examples used by Freakonomics concerning the purchase of Prii (according to Toyota this is the plural of Prius). I assume that many of you would guess that Prii sell better in certain demographics and areas. Freakonomics indicates that you would be correct in your guess. The purchase of a Prius says something about the person, or at least the person hopes that it says something about them. SUVs do the same thing, just the message is often the opposite.

I’m not judging here because the reality is that we all signal. There is a reason that many Christians wear T-shirts with Christian slang and messages on them and it isn’t about sharing the good news of Jesus Christ with those who do not know Christ. Nope it is signalling the group you belong to. A stupid example from my own life comes from a mission program called World Changers that I used to do every Summer when I was a youth minister. The first year I went to a World Changers project I noticed that the vast majority of people who had been to previous World Changers projects used the same type of hammer. It was an Estwing. They are great hammers but seriously very few teens or adults use a hammer often enough in their daily lives to need a serious quality hammer. Nope. The reason people got Estwing was because it was a signal. “I’ve done this before.” “This isn’t my first project.” “I’m not a noob.” It is really amazing how many messages those hammers were sending and yes I do have an Estwing hammer. Why do you ask. 😉

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I’m signalling “Roll Tide Roll” at the moment.

We all signal. There is a reason that you can often tell what a person’s hobbies are just from their looks. Signalling. There is a reason that you can often tell what a person does for a living just by a quick glance. Signalling. Look at a kid and make a quick guess concerning whether he/she goes to public school, private school, alternative school, or is home schooled. Signalling is alive and well there too. Heck, I know people whose signalling is all about what they don’t use or have. The lack of something can be just as much about signalling. Not having something can also tell others you are a part of the in crowd of a certain group. My personal favorite signalling group is the Apple fanboy pastor group. Don’t worry fanboy pastors we know you are cool and can really relate to us because you have Apple products all around. That too is signalling. It is saying “Hey, I belong to this style of pastor.” Anyhow, I don’t have a problem with most signalling. I am actually signalling right now as I type this post. What I have a problem with is our signalling conflicting and control us.

My problem with signalling arises when people don’t consider what they are actually signalling. Actually to be most accurate my problem is when I don’t consider what i am actually signalling. For example, my relationship with Jesus Christ is the overriding priority of my life. I hope and believe that Jesus changes and affects everything I do. What if my signalling is is sending the opposite message. I remember signing the song “Rescue” at a conference when I was truck by the signals coming from the group signing the song. One lyric of the song states “This world has nothing for me,” a great lyric, but it seemed a little odd when I realized that the guy singing the lyric was playing what I was fairly sure was a $6,000 guitar. I send out signals all the time. Do they match with who I really want to be? With whom I have been called, and I am becoming, by Christ? Or is what I am actually signalling most important to me?

I hope that I am always questioning why I do, use, or wear something and I am considering what it signals. I hope you are doing this too.

SIDE NOTE – I only have a cursory knowledge of signalling theory and I would love to read more. If you know of a good book on the subject please let me know.

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You Are More Beautiful Than You Think You Are

Wow Dove. Great job on this. ht Pamela.

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Where Am I?

I know recently I haven’t been posting much on the blog and this makes me sad. Not so much because I believe many people other than my mom and dad read this thing (Hi Mom! Hi Dad) but more so because I think through things better when I am writing about them. Unfortunately the vast majority of the interesting experiences that I am going through right now are happening in St. Michael’s hospital or in my Clinical Pastoral Education peer meeting and both of these are covered by various layers of confidentiality so I can’t type about them. This is pretty frustrating because I have had some pretty cool and funny things happen to and around me. I am going to force myself to start writing a few times each week because I miss it.

So here are some random thoughts:

  • I wish there was a really good chili dog place in Point. I don’t know of one right now but I have been told that Square Scoops has a decent hotdog. I’ll find out in the next week or two. Every now and then I get the urge to start my own chili dog push cart. It would be cool during the Summer but I have no idea what I would do with it during the Winter.
  • Reading a merely mediocre book after reading a string of really good books is a taxing experience. I am presently reading An Introduction to Pastoral Care by Charles Gerkin for CPE right now and it is ok. I just find it hard to get into Gerkin’s writing style. This is driving me nuts because I just finishing reading The American Spiritual Cultural by William Dean and World War Z: An Oral History of the Zombie War by Max Brooks, both of which really drew me in. Unfortunately I have to finish Gerkin’s book for CPE and thus I will push through it. I’m not sure what I am going to start on after I finish Gerkin. Thinking about reading some Kathryn Tanner (Christ the Key) or reading some Kurt Vonnegut.
  • No work has been done on Fred the Sentra for the past few months because snow is on the ground and therefore the garage is pretty much always wet or icy. Not a fun environment for being under a car. I’ve been researching a few things on how to fix the rust spots. I think I will be teaching myself to weld this Summer.
  • Just in case you don’t know this – I have a really cool family. Pam and the boys are just awesome and interesting people. I really enjoy talking with my wife and kid ands and hearing their thoughts on the world. If you haven’t recently hung out with Pam, Adam, or Noah you really should.
  • Since I am bragging on family I also want to make sure you guys know how awesome the church I get to be a part of is. Tapestry is awesome. I am honored to be a part of it. If you haven’t looked at the Lenten Project that we are doing you really should.
  • I’m doing a poll on Tapestry’s facebook page right now concerning what the church’s next message series should be. Right now “Anything as long as it is short” seems to be the consensus winner. I guess 88 weeks on the Gospel according to Mark might have been a little long. 🙂

I guess that is it for now. Hopefully this will get the blogging stone rolling again.

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Pointing versus Creating

I just heard a statement on a podcast I was listening to concerning pointing becoming more valuable than creating in Western culture. What does this mean. Well what was referenced is that we have begun to value the acting of pointing out something that is interesting or cool more than we do the actual creating of the item. Think of how many things you have “shared” via facebook, twitter, instagram, good read, reddit, boing boing, or some other social network versus how much you have actually created for someone else to point to. Reddit and boing boing really just exist to point out interesting thing. Or consider Pinterest. These are entire social media networks established just to point out interesting things. I don’ t think this is an age thing either. My parents point to/share just as many videos, photos, graphics as my kids do. Pam and I do the same thing (though Pam creates I fair amount too).

Right now, I’m not sure what this means or even how to speculate about what it might reference concerning modern culture. I do however find it interesting and therefore thought I would point it out. 😉

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Alone Together

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Just finished a fun conversation with one of the baristas at Emy J’s, Mindy, concerning Sherry Turkle‘s thought on much of modern society being alone together. I heard Dr. Turkle lecture at a conference and I find her work fascinating. One of the things Turkle talked about was the change between modern coffee shops and coffee shops of the 18th century. The 18th century coffee shop was where the discussions that led to the American Revolution took place. They were a "third place" that people went to and talked with each other. They may have gone to the coffee shop alone but once there you were a part of a group and you interacted with the group. You might have come to the coffee shop alone but you were together once there.

The modern coffee shop? Well it is still a "third place" but if a person goes there alone he/she often does so to be around others but alone at the same time. Ear buds, ipods, smart phones, tablets, and computers enable us to be within 18 inches of another person and yet completely disengaged from the world we share with them. We can be talking with a "friend" on Facebook while completely unaware of the person who is almost touching us. I know a number of people who come to Emy J’s so I usually have a conversation with a few people when I am here. It is still amazing to me how many people are "alone together" here. I am sure that much of that is purposeful and needed. While working on my dissertation I needed lots of quite time. I would place my earbuds in for two purposes, 1) to use the music to partially drown out the noise around me, and 2) to discourage people from interrupting me. Sometimes this is needed. I completely understand that. I also believe that it is often habit. Someone wants to be around people but has developed the habit of "walling" themselves off and can no longer socially interact with strangers.

Anyhow this was a really fun conversation to have with Mindy while we were standing in a coffee shop. Drr. Turkle talks about this in more depth in her book "Alone Together."

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Idealism and Practice

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I have smart friends. It is a nice thing every now and then but often it is a pain. The reason it is a pain is because they get me to read things that I wouldn’t read on my own. One of those friends who is a pain is my friend Clint. Presently I am reading "A Distant Mirror" by Barbara Tuchman because of Clint suggesting it. The problem with the book is two fold. 1) It is a long book that covers a lot of detailed events and people, and 2) it is really good and therefore I can’t just dismiss it as boring and stop reading it.

Darn you Clint.

Any how "A Distant Mirror" is basically about 14th century France in the midst of the Black Plague. It is fascinating. I have studied more about ancient societies than I have medieval Europe so this is a relatively new subject for me. One of the things that is intriguing me the most the author’s description of how idealism and practice pertained to the three estates of medieval European society. Apparently European society of the middle ages was amazingly idealistic. It makes sense considering the fact that we still understand the concept of chivalry (a distinct form of medieval thought). Society was separated into three estates that were supposed to b mutually supportive.

  • The Clergy
  • The Nobility
  • The Commoners

Each estate had a roll. The clergy and nobility were supposedly focsed on the potection of society. The nobility protected society through the use of arms while the clergy potected society through a focus on faith, thought, and government. The commoners focused on the production of society. In theory each estate supported each other and helped society through that support.

Of course, the theory wasn’t usually lived out. Each estate often, at best, forgot to support one another. Instead of protecting the commoners the nobility, the estate that was supposed to be the millitary protection of society, actually became the biggest threat that the commoners faced during their daily lives. Interesting side note – Tuchman discussed that since the destruction of the means of production has been a pretty common form of warfare throughout history it was often common for knights to fight against unarmed commoners. Thus hurting their enemy’s economy by hurting the society’s ability to produce. Armored knights fighting unarmed civilians, not really what you think of when you think of chivalry is it?

Anyhow the idealism of the time was talked and written about a lot. It was common knowledge in European society. It was the source of souch of their literature and entertainment. I mean their idealism has surived 600 years which is why you and I still know what it means to b chivalrous. Yet their ideals often didn’t translate into their actions. The potectors became the persecutors. Of course, it wasn’t just the nobility who did this. The clergy and the commoners did it too. The nobility are just the easiest to point out. Instead of functioning according to their ideals they did the exact opposite.

Sound familair? Yeah they are so different from us.

Now I have to go back to reading this long book. Thanks Clint.

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Bigotry?

I don’t know what to think of the whole Louie Giglio / Inauguration thing. For those who have no idea what I am talking about you can get a brief idea of it by reading Giglio’s open letter concerning the situation that he realized via this tweet.

Truthfully I don’t expect to know what I think about it for a week or two. I figure over the next few days people with agendas on the right and the left will paint the whole incident in such a manner to convey their worst ideas about the other side. The worst part of this whole thing in my opinion is that a man whose actions have shown amazing care for many on the margins of society will now be painted by brushes that make him look hateful, which while I don’t know him personally I do believe his actions have sown he is not. If I were Louie Giglio I think I would probably come out of this whole thing wanting to punch both the people at Fox News and MSNBC in the nose. Of course, he probably won’t feel that way because he is a nicer guy than I am. Yes he believes that homosexual activity is declared by scripture to be sinful (which I do too) but by no means does that mean that he (or I) hate the people who practice such activity.

I have a few friends that I love dearly who are practicing homosexuals. If you mess with them I can promise you I would be there with them standing against you. I love these friends even though I disagree with some parts of their life. Of course, that is true of my heterosexual friends also. To be honest a couple of my friends who are homosexual have challenged the way I think concerning homosexuality and I am very thankful for them for that. Their thoughts have caused me to think differently concerning how I approach the subject of what scripture says about homosexual activity. I don’t think my disagreement with them concerning whether or not their sex life is considered sinful by the God revealed in Jesus makes me a bigot. It just means we disagree about what scripture says. If it does make me a bigot then I guess I am a much bigger bigot concerning those heterosexuals who aren’t following God’s sexual guidelines because numbers-wise there is a whole lot more of them.

I guess I’ll just try to love everyone and in my opinion part of that is being honest with everyone.

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Check Theft?

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Well it has been an interesting morning. I just got off the phone with Chase after reporting what I believe is the identity theft of one of their customers. Apparently a crook has an email close to mine because one of his/her friends emailed me photos of a blank check (address, account number, and routing number). Couldn’t track down the name on the check so I just called Chase instead and reported it. I have forwarded the email and images to them and I guess it will all be handled now. If only the crook would have sent a picture of him/herself along with the check images.