it’s been a long, enjoyable day with my family (both nuclear and extended since pam’s nieces are staying with us for the week) but i needed to take a second to call a coward a coward. another anonymous postcard concerning the drama that is presently going on in our church arrived in the mail today. previously we have had anonymous letters but now someone has started sending out anonymous postcards. the picture above is today’s postcard which as usual has no return address as well as nothing on it indicating where it has come from. COWARD! i hate anonymous letters and anonymous postcards. i took the picture of the postcard after i had thrown it in the garbage. that’s what becomes of anonymous letters and postcards.
today pam, the boys, my nieces, and one of the neighborhood kids went with me to global wildlife in folsom, louisiana. while we were there i heard a story from the tour guide that reinforces how evil the boy scouts are. here’s the story.
awhile back a group of boy scouts went to global wildlife really wanting to see one of the lamas at the park spit. you see lamas spit at whatever they feel is threatening them. it’s one of their defense techniques. the boys scouts really wanted to see this defense and thus they grabbed the lama’s ears, thumped it, hit it, and pulled it’s tail in an attempt to get the lama to spit. eventually they succeeded in ticking the lama off and it began to spit. that’s when the boy scouts learn some new and valuable lessons concerning lamas.
first, lamas don’t actually spit. no it’s not spit that shoots out of their mouths but rather vomit. the vomit stinks and continues to smell for quite some time even after you have tried to wash it off. imagine getting sprayed by a skunk and you’ve got the right smell.
second, the boy scouts learned that lamas don’t spit just one time. no lamas apparently really like spitting at their enemies and thus do it with great vigor. so lamas continue to spit/puke on their enemy until it has run away from them. if the boy scouts had been on foot they could have actually run away from the lamas and thereby ended their vomit dousing. unfortunately for the scouts they were on a trailer being pulled by a tractor and the tractor had stopped at the lama’s spot for everyone to be able to feed them. thus the trailer wasn’t moving and the angry lama took full advantage of the trailer’s stationary nature.
thirdly, the now smelly boy scouts learned that lamas like to defend each other and thus when one lama spits on an enemy all the other lamas join it to protect their friend. so all the other lamas in the area joined the ticked off lama in continually spitting at the now covered in vomit troop of boy scouts.
finally, the rancid scouts learned that lamas are not easily tricked. the scouts sought cover in the only spot of defense they could find – under the bench that they had been sitting on. this meant that the bench was protecting their topside and the canvas tarp on the side of the trailer was protecting their side. unfortunately, there was a small open crack between the floor and the side tarp. the lamas soon found this crack and began spitting through it. by the end of the trip the boys scouts had learned not to mess with lamas.