it’s better than ketchup

i really like the word “salsa”. it’s a fun word to say. say it right now, you’ll see for yourself that it’s just plain fun.

“salsa”. see?

jerry seinfeld once said that the reason that salsa passed ketchup as america’s most popular condiment is because it is more fun to say than ketchup. i think quite often we don’t enjoy our words enough. some are funny but so often we ignore then humor in them. when you say a funny word you simply have to enjoy their humor and laugh a little.

i wish that i ate mexican food everyday just so i could have a reason to say “salsa.”

salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa.

“wow!” and “what!”

“wow!”
pam and i saw “the passion of the CHRIST” today and words can not convey what it was like. i’m sure their will be people who criticize it but i believe it was incredibly moving. yes, there were a few biblical inaccuracies but they were minor. i left the theater in silence.

“what!”
when i got home the silence was broken. adam and noah, my kids had a guest over (our neighbor spencer) he’s a great kid and no trouble at all. however, when my kids get together with anyone they apparently become deaf and have to SHOUT in order to be able to hear each other. i’ve experienced this phenomenon before but it was finally confirmed yesterday and today. yesterday both adam and noah had a guest spend the night. the second the first kid enter the house the sound level within the house jumped up by 20 decibels. i asked them to be quiet and speak at normal levels but of course, since they had suddenly become deaf i had to shout at them to be quiet, which defeats the whole purpose of asking them to be quiet in the first place. i thought this sudden hearing loss was odd but then it corrected itself once our guests left and went back to their own homes. i figured it was just a momentary thing but then it reappeared once spencer arrived to spend the night. when spencer arrive adam and noah began shouting again.

i think the reason for this temporary hearing loss is that their hearing depends heavily upon air pressure. it is my belief that once another person enters the house their breathing lowers the air pressure within the structure and therefore my kids have to begin shouting. logically this can be expressed as:

guests = lower air pressure
lower air pressure = temporary hearing loss
therefore guests = temporary hearing loss.

this is a valid syllogism and therefore it must be true.

the wonderful thing about this is that now that i have discovered the problem i can go about fixing it. so from now on i am going to put adam and noah in high pressure “bubble” suits when they have guests come over to spend the night. this should solve the problem and my house will be quiet again. i love logic.

yeehaa

i’m presently watching “city slickers” with pam, my wife. i know this is not very thrilling for you but i’m enjoying it and i thought i would type something in the blog. “city slickers” really is a great movie. it’s funny and makes a good point.

as a parent i am proud to announce that i developed a bocce addiction with my kids. we regularly go outside and spend time bowling the balls at the jack. i’m not sure that we are playing bocce correctly but it sure is fun. of course, i feel like i’m a part of the italian mafia the entire time that i am playing.

i’ve been bouncing around on the web recently reading as many blogs as i can. i’ve read the blogs of professors, teens, parents, friends, and many others. i used to think that blogs were basically online journals but i now have a different impression. i don’t write the things in this blog that i write in my journal. my journal is where i express my raw, untainted emotions and thoughts. i write in my journal what i don’t want anyone else but GOD to know and i write it there because no one else will read it. blogs are a different breed. must people tend to type out comments concerning life in their blogs. i’m convinced that blogs are part of our conversation on what life is all about. i type out my thoughts and then you, the uninvolved reader, comment on what you think. reading other people’s blogs is basically like sitting at a coffee table and talking about why we live. the discussions are not always that well founded but they are still discussions.

on a side not real life comes into play. there are some stupid things that happen in this world. it really is a great, big, stupid world.

as elvis sings “girls, girls, girls…”

i feel like i am typically pretty secure in my masculinity. i’m okay with the fact that i sometimes actually watch “chick flicks” with my wife and actually like them. i’ve even read “people” magazine once or twice. yet tonight there was way too much feminine spirit within the view student ministry for me. tonight was our first ever “feminar” – an overnight event just for the girls. there is pink all over the student center even as i type, with 60 some females bouncing off all the walls talking about female things and probably painting their toe nails and washing their hair – i have no idea what girls do when they get together.

i went up to the student center for 10 minutes just to say “hi” to all the females and then run away. i took my kids with me figuring that they would help keep my testosterone level up. both of the boys were so scared by all the females together in one room that they refused to go into the auditorium and instead stayed in the hallway waiting for me to finish and leave. the little cowards left me by myself to face all those half-crazed females – i thought i had raised them better than that.

females are very scary creatures that make no sense to me. in fact, in my opinion one of the proofs that GOD is GOD is that HE understands females – even females don’t understand themselves. a female starts crying and you ask her why she’s crying and there will be a good chance that she will say “i don’t know!” females make no sense. i hope those girls are having a great time tonight and i love each of them very much. yet, i have to admit that i am very glad i have a houseful of boys.

whoosh!

fast pitch softball scares me. i used to play baseball – a long time ago – and i used to umpire baseball – not quite as long ago. i was never scared of a baseball zooming past me at faster speeds than a softball ever travels, but baseballs are small. softballs are large. it’s the size of the softball that freaks me out. it was never intended by the LORD GOD ALMIGHTY for anyone to stand still when an object as large as a softball was thrown towards them. it’s a reflex. you see a softball sized object coming towards you and you instinctually duck. it’s the way it should be. baseballs are below this reflex level. this is why baseball makes sense – the ball is small enough not to cause our natural human response of fear and trembling. this is only true for fast pitch softball, slow pitch is a different beast completely.

i went to watch woodlawn high school play softball today and the whole experience was scary for me. i kept on wanting to shout at the girls standing in the batters’ box “get out of the way! there’s a softball-sized object coming towards you!” for some reason i don’t understand they did not seem scared of the softballs. it appears as if i am the only human who knows about the anti-softball reflex.

i’m presently watching a professor in thermodynamics on “the late show” sit in ice water for 2 five minutes segments and discuss hypothermia. you wouldn’t think this was very funny, but for some reason it is. letterman is the greatest.

one fast wienner

we just found out that adam’s hot dog pinewood derby car was so fast that it qualified for the district pinewood derby competition. this means that the hotdog will now be taking the banner of “pack 205” to another competition to display it’s agility and strength.

the view tonight wasn’t that great (it has to happen every now and then). i hate it when things don’t go great and so i’m moopping around a little. some people eat chocolate when they are down, others listen to music, but i have a better strategy. i watch “the outlaw josey wales” whenever i’m down in the dunps. there is just nothing like a good dose of clint eastwood to make things seem better.

almost caught

today was a little scary. as the two people who actually read this blog know (hey mom and dad) i give a different name to the cashier every time i eat at rasin cane’s. i’ve been doing this since january 3, 2001 the first day i ate at a cane’s restaurant. that’s over three years of false names and never once has anybody ever noticed that i had given them a fictitious name. that is until today.

today i went to cane’s and gave them the name “humphrey.” unfortunately, the cashier that was taken my order was not a real good speller. she asked me how to spell “humphrey” and then said “i’ll just look at your card.” of course, when she looked at the card she became confused as to why my card would say “robert a. terrell” instead of �humphrey.� she then began to question me about the whole thing. i have never realized how hard it is to prove that you are yourself, after you’ve lied about what your name is.

it was a very disturbing day.

argh!

i don’t like the way diane sawyer does interviews. i just finished watching the interview between her and mel gibson and i’m fed up. i really try to not be one of those people who just assume something is great because the name of CHRIST is attached to it. i personally think that allot of junk has been sold using CHRIST’s name and personally i think this is offensive. with this said in my opinion diane sawyer put everything in as negative light as possible while throwing slow softball pitches to anyone who disagreed with gibson. i’m okay with her trashing gibson. i’m okay with her having questions about the gospels. i’m okay with her questioning how the gospels have been interpreted. i believe in a GOD who can handle our questions and WHO is not afraid of tackling though debates.

BUT

all i ask is that anybody doing this as a supposed “unbiased” newsperson do it consistently and ask the same rough questions of both sides and phrases your statements as close to even as possible. rather, than making everything seem as though one side is right and the other just stupid. i was truly offended when she started making statements like “CHRISTians believe … while historians believe …” like there are no intelligent CHRISTians. i don’t believe that i am one of those people who thinks every statement is against CHRISTians but sawyer’s statements really got under my skin.

most extreme elimination challenge

i love my job!

i know that i say this about every 5th entry but it really is true. my job is the greatest because while i’m doing something very important and meaningful i get to include really cool things within it and have alot of fun while doing it. i’ve been working on a swish movie (shockwave) for wednesday and i decided to included within the movie the theme some from the “spiketv” show “mxc” (most extreme elimination challenge). i love this show. i usually turned the volume down on the television, because the commentary is not always that great but the program is hilarious. me and the boys watch the contestants kill themselves and laugh. for some reason it is great to watch strangers put themselves through near fatal challenges.

i had to cook tonight. pam and adam went to the movies so i was left making supper. i cooked chicken divan from a receipt. it was an extremely scary adventure. men were not meant to cook in your normal household kitchen. a man’s cooking talents go beyond the size of the normal kitchen. this is why we either cook outside on the grill where our talents can freely expand throughout the universe or use a professional kitchen which has enough room to at least withstand our skills until we can take them outside and cook over a fire again. i was at least able to hold my talents in a enough to make the divan. it was touchy there for a little while but i kept those talents in.